They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
