Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
home. puking in laundry basket.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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