hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize