your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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