if you like me you must not know who I am
it hurts more in the daytime
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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