you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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