"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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