my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
