what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
