Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I am naked and annoyed.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
