Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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