she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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