sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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