i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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