he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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