dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
