I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Did I show you my penis last night?
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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