Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
