Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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