Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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