At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Randomize
