we're blogging at a bar
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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