right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Green mimosas i think yes
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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