After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
time to smoke my breakfast
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize