Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
