Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I just had sex on a roof
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
