i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize