I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
