Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I am one with the molecules
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
