It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
accomplished twins. life is a go
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Randomize
