The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
