i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize