please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
