there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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