If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
