I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
