May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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