I can tuck mytits in my pants
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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