Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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