Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Randomize