i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Someone shattered a urinal.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Randomize
