Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Im part way to drunk.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
