So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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