omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
