So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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