Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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