Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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