i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
