Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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