I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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