brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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